Before getting into this recipe (I promise it will all make sense in the end), I would like to openly discuss some personal matters, if you don’t mind.
It’s been a while since I last talked about my fertility issues here. As some of you may know, my husband and I have been trying to have a baby for almost 2 years now. There really are no words to describe all the ups and downs and all the feelings that accompany the monthly anticipation of “Oh honey, I think this might be it!” only to find that the heartless pregnancy test shows no smiley face. I didn’t think it was possible to experience such an array of emotions all at once.
Perhaps it’s weariness, the sense of helplessness, or the numbness even that makes me feel more at ease over time. There comes a point when you hit a wall and say enough is enough! I’m finally learning (once again) to accept the fact that I have no control in life. For so long, I believed that God doesn’t give me more than I can handle. He loves me so why would He inflict so much pain on me? But sure enough, it is written that God breaks us so he can remake us (Hebrews 12:4-12) so that we may be renewed and will find our strength in Jesus Christ alone. So I’ve rephrased my previous belief to say that God does not give me more than Jesus can handle. I have my tumultuous moments, but I’m finally learning to find peace in the midst of all this. That doesn’t mean we’ve stopped trying…I’m just not putting so much pressure on myself or allowing the emotions to get the best of me.
To go into more detail about my situation, I had hypothalamic amenorrhea and worked really hard to get healthier. Thankfully, my cycle has been regular for about a year now at the expense of having to get a whole new wardrobe, but hey, I’m okay with that ;). My ultrasound looked great apparently, blood test came out normal except my estradiol was still on the low side. I’ve taken Femara twice and just finished my third cycle of Clomid, both at the lowest dosages. In case you’re wondering, I did not turn into a crazy woman..well not until the third cycle anyway. Let’s just say that I was a ball of emotions. I’ve invested a lot of money in purchasing ovulation kits (Clearblue is the one I recommend most), and I check every month to make sure that I’m ovulating. Apparently, just because you have a cycle doesn’t necessarily mean you ovulate. I had no idea. Sure enough, I get a smiley face each time. So why? Why am I not getting pregnant? You can understand my frustration, right?
So then two weeks ago, on Labor Day, I went through with IUI. Tim and I had been considering this for a long time, and we finally decided to give it a try. Everything worked out smoothly! The timing was perfect (you have to go in the day after you ovulate, and it happened to fall on a holiday!) and cost wise, our insurance paid for part of it and the rest we paid with Tim’s wellness credit. We ended up paying a little over $100 out of pocket. Not too shabby.
We’d been praying with our hands on my womb (don’t try to picture it as it may seem a bit comical), and waiting patiently for 2 weeks which is when I’m supposed to go in for a blood test. Well, looks like I can scratch that off my list as I started this past Friday. I don’t want to relive that day again…
But you know what got me through it? My husband’s text message (he was in Houston that day) that said that he’s thankful for this hardship as his love for me is growing stronger and stronger because of it. It was enough to get me back up on my feet to face another day with gratitude.
Whew! I’m glad I got that off of my chest! Now, onto this recipe. The mind is a really funny thing. So I’ve been obsessed with olives lately. At first, my close friends asked me if I was pregnant. Apparently you start craving pickled foods? Anyway, upon hearing that, I thought, “hmm..maybe so!” Then I started eating even more thinking, “My body’s craving them! It’s a sign!” I can’t tell you how many times I’ve made pasta puttanesca. As soon as I found out I’m not pregnant, though, all of a sudden I find them less desirable.
I made this dish when I was in my “#1 olive lover” mode and devoured it. I wonder if I will like it just the same now… I’m sure I will!
This is a quick and simple recipe with minimal ingredients…a perfect busy weeknight meal!
- 3 tsp extra virgin olive oil
- 4 skinless, boneless chicken breasts
- 1 med yellow onion, sliced thinly
- 1 garlic, minced
- ⅓ cup pitted olives, roughly chopped
- 1 cup cherry tomatoes, cut in half
- 1 Tbs balsamic vinegar
- Mixed greens
- Heat a grill pan coated w/ 2 tsp oil over med-high heat. Season chicken with salt and pepper. Add to pan and cook about 6-8 min. on each side or until done.
- In another pan, add 1 tsp oil and cook onion until caramelized. Add garlic, olives, cherry tomatoes and stir. Add balsamic vinegar.
- Serve relish with chicken.